Thursday, March 31, 2005

Another Selfish Rant

I'm getting tired of selfish people, I really am. I am an only child. Perhaps at age 56 that should read...I am an only adult of an even more adult mother...soon she'll be 80 and she's still a pip. Anyway, the only reason I mention my only-child status is because I understand selfishness. I truly do. I just don't think there's any place for it once you reach a certain age.

The car blinker thing still riles me. I need to have signs printed that I can snap up to my window when I see bad blinker behavior. I'm trying to work out exactly what I want my signs to say. So far, I've come up with the following...remember, I can't be completely rude or I might just get shot. I can only flash these signs when I'm in middle or upper-middle class areas, and only at cars driven by extremely suburban-looking drivers. When I'm in the city or in suspect neighborhoods, I just need to ignore bad blinker behavior. But...guess what...the worst blinker behavior is in the 'burbs. Surprise...

Did you forget something or is your rudeness intentional ?



I'm Sure you don't Mean to be Rude...or do you?

You drive like an old lady in the middle of Wisconsin...use your blinker.

Anyway, my rant today isn't about blinkers, although it did feel good to get that off my chest. It's about stupid, selfish women who STAND in the shallow end of a lane in which I'm actually trying to do laps. The routine is this: the water aerobics class finishes and the lap lane dividers go back up. It's very clear. When the class is finished, lap swimmers get to reclaim the pool. These two women were in my class. The class finished, the lanes became clearly marked once again and these two morons stood in the middle of MY lane. After ten laps I said, politely, "Would you mind moving over, I'm trying to swim some laps." They didn't answer and I really would like to think that they never heard me, but since that is flippin' impossible, I can only assume that they CHOSE to ignore me. Bitches. Anyway, I kept on swimming and then finally, when I felt rage bubbling up inside me at their selfishness, I stopped and had a little chat with them. It went something like this, all said very reasonably. "Look, I know you're busy chatting and probably didn't notice me swimming back and forth and back and forth for the last 20 mintues, and you probably never heard me politely ask you if you could scoot over, but don't you think it's a little self-centered and rude NOT to have moved for me and what is your problem...are you FUCKING NUTZ?" They still didn't answer me and still didn't move. Quite frankly, I didn't get it. But, I did a few more laps and then went into the locker room to shower. The showers were all being used so I waited where you wait and then one of these moronic women who I'd just gone [I thought] crazy on, comes out of the sauna and actually feels comfortable talking to me. She says...seriously (and I would have been pissed off for life if someone had talked to me the way I had just talked at her and I never would communicate to that person again)..."Are you waiting for a shower?" I just looked at her and said, yes. She said, "Well, I wouldn't dream of going in front of you, but give me a shout when the next one comes free, okay?" I said, "Are you nuts?" and went into the next shower. I think they really are just now I feel a little badly at speaking harshly to crazy people.


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